This is the story of a girl who cried a river and drowned the whole world.

Everything I touch turns to crap.

I had another post in mind for yesterday, something I wrote the night before, all about tears. I typed most of it into this text box, but it just got to the point where I couldn't finish it. For some reason. I'm sure I will post it again one day, so just consider this a teaser. Here's what I wrote instead:

This is my first time going on my computer all day...and I only came on to do research for a paper I need to write. That's right, I had a technology-free day. I was doing an experiment of sorts, that isn't directly related to staying off of my phone and the internet...but it sure helped matters. (And I guess it also helped matters that my phone service was "temporarily suspended" today).

I wasn't expecting today to be a particularly good day, mostly because I approached it with the wrong attitude, but it sure surpassed my negative expectations. I did see a good friend today, unexpectedly, and we hung out for a little while, on my city-walk, which was nice.

I woke up kind of down-trodden and that turned out to be a theme of my day. I wandered around the city and spent the entire day out of my apartment. That's nice, I really like spending the whole day out doing stuff, even if it's just walking around aimlessly. Some days I don't appreciate this city as much as I should.

I ate outside today, in a park. Just sat there by myself, in silence. Not even an ipod in my ears. (I told you, technology-free day. My phone service came back on just in time to talk to my brother for a little while, which is always a treat. He truly makes my days. But that was the extent of my technology usage.. I was away from my computer all day and even when I got back to it, I immediately closed all of my ichat tabs that had popped up while I was away, and I didn't even go on facebook).

I don't know why I don't eat outside every day. (I'm laughing because I read my friend's book yesterday- "Stuff White People Like." Eating outside was definitely one of them).

Well, for better or for worse, it was me, my Vietnamese takeout, and my thoughts, in the park today. I was quiet and present...and slightly cool, because the grass was damp enough to keep you dry, but damp enough to make your feet cold. It was a beautiful day and that was the only time today I didn't mind being alone.

It was when I left the park though, that things went downhill. Like I said, today already wasn't my favorite, but it got progressively worse when I left and my grandpa's awesome striped bag that I wear a lot, broke. One side of the strap just ripped right off, in the middle of the street. I was/am terribly disappointed, because the only way I can fix it is to sew it or something. The other side of the strap started to tear a little while back, but I was able to tie it in a little knot, to keep it together. But this one's a clean break, there's no way to fake it. And I can't sew. I need to learn...or find a fashion major.

I tried going to the library to watch a film I need to watch for class, and write a paper on. (I'm very late on this, shh!). But I got there just in time for the "the library's closing in 30 minutes" announcement. What kind of library closes early on a Saturday? Surely I'm not the only one who wanted to spend their Saturday night in a library...right?

I left there, started thinking about things I wasn't supposed to be thinking about today, as a string of 3 or 4 "sad" songs came on, completely mirroring my every thought of course. Ipods have a funny way of playing songs just in time to match your every mood.

I bought myself some lotion and nail polish to lift my spirits. Haven't used 'em yet. I did some laundry, broke off the door handle, and got locked in and out of the scary basement.

I feel like I'm leaving something out, but I don't really care. One funny thing that happened is that I finally got initiated into the "NBA Sightings Club." I'm really excited about this because pretty much everyone I know has seen some NBA player or team in their time here, except me...until today. Unfortunately, I'm not as cool as the previous NBA spotters, because I'm not sure who the NBA guy I saw, was. I may not have recognized the NBA player that I saw, but as I was walking to the library, looking down and fiddling with my broken bag, I looked up and did recognize the pack of fans with cameras flashing at me, as soon as I got in front of them. I looked up, confused... "Surely all these people aren't here for me..."After standing there for a second, soaking up my paparazzi training, I looked behind me and see that I'm kind of blocking the doors, where... *insert famous NBA player's name here,* was standing, trying to exit. Whoops. Kind of embarrassing I guess, but the good news is that there's probably a picture floating around out there, of me and someone's idol, woo!

Also, my effort to continue my "no sweets since I've been back in SF" streak was almost seriously compromised this morning, when I was sitting within a foot of a girl that smelled like chocolate chip cookies. A spawn of Mrs. Fields, perhaps. She's lucky, she made it out of my eyesight in the nick of time. (Especially because her and her boyfriend were the most disgustingly cute things I've ever seen, it was driving me nuts).

This song came on my ipod today. Forgot how much I liked it.

Listen to the lyrics.