Who says all of life's problems can't be solved with a pint of ice cream?

I have discovered, recently, that I am an emotional eater. I wish that wasn't the case, I wish I was one of those lucky few who fast when they're sad; those who go through a period of "sadness starvation," if you will. But not me. You can always tell when I'm going through a rough time by the width of my face. My smile disappears along with my jawline.

That being said, I'm sure it's of no surprise to you, that for the majority of my life, I honestly believed that most of life's problems could be solved by dunking your spoon into a pint of Ben & Jerry's and not coming out until you've hit bottom. (The bottom...of the pint, although I can understand the confusion).

This problem really came to a head this past Christmas break, when I put on an embarrassing display of food annihilation, in front of a close personal friend of mine. Now, a true friend wouldn't let me put away an entire wing of the Publix Supermarket alone, so a couple hours (don't judge me) later, we finally put down the last of the cookie yo-yo's, and retreated to the couch for a food coma. I didn't fully recover from that experience until the next day....but that didn't stop me from repeating it a few days later, this time in the comfort of my own home, during a movie...and again, a few days after that, at a funeral reception.

Just when I thought my emotional eating habits were getting out of control and I needed to find another way to deal with my feelings (alcohol? crystal meth?), this happened:

As of four days ago, these were the things that were less than perfect in my world:

-Rent money: don't have any

-Money for anything: $-36 in da bank, so... no.

-Money for out-of-school comedy class: ^ still, no.

-School/advisors: not happy with me.

(So, I'm taking 4 different classes in 4 different majors...let me live my life).

-Eyeballs: only work up-close.

-Much-needed glasses: please see points 1, 2 & 3.

I wasn't nearly as worried about this as I should have been, considering I spent my last $9 in cash on a "Lethal Mai Tai" I saw on the travel channel. (Priorities...priorities).

Now, if you've been paying attention thus far, you'd know that this is the point where I would turn to my best friends Ben & Jerry, while simultaneously satisfying every craving I've ever had. However, these "feeling feasts" work a whole lot better when you have cash money. And since I don't, I turned to the next best coping mechanism: Sleeping.

(We can address my sleeping habits in another post).

I dream a lot when I sleep, and I have a lot of nightmares. But in this particular slumber, I had a glorious dream - a poor person's substitute for real life luxuries.

I dreamt that I was eating an entire pint of ice cream, with Oreos and popcorn in it, in a movie theater by myself.

(I don't know what movie I was watching, the important thing is that I didn't have to share my ice cream).

So, let's recap: no money, no outside class I want to take, no rent, no food, no hope... (ok, ok).

Ice cream dream.

Then, suddenly -

We're able to put our Costco membership to use. Rent money comes in and we're able to make our deadline by the skin of our teeth. And, I am able to take my comedy class after-all! Granted, my advisor is still calling me every day, trying to convince me to change my classes, and I'm still going to need new glasses at some point, so I can actually see what I'm learning in aforementioned classes.. but the biggest of our troubles are over...for now. We'll still have struggles, every month I'm sure, but I find it hard to believe that my ice cream dream didn't have something to do with helping us out of this one.

Oh, and Mom- you'll be getting a HUGE shout-out at the Oscars for supporting me figuratively and literally, even when you probably shouldn't have.

I know I suck at this.

But... I can explain.

SF life has been crazy. Crazy good and.....well, crazy crazy. I might have to review those pictures from my last post a little more often, to remind myself that I really do have a killer time out here. (I don't really have to remind myself that I love San Francisco). What I mean by that is... I have to remind myself that I love being a broke art student in San Francisco :)

I found my old blog today, from right before I moved to SF. I completely forgot that I had this blog, and I'm not sure why I ever quit writing in it, except that I was new to the blogisphere, and didn't know how to act yet. I took it as a good sign that I giggled my way through reading it. I'm not sure if it's because I'm actually funny, or if it's because it's 6:30 am and I haven't slept yet...and I'm not going to. But regardless, it makes me feel like maybe my dreams of being on the "Top 7 Comics to Watch" list at Punchline Comedy Club, aren't sooooo far away after all. (Even if the audience does have to be sleep deprived to enjoy me).

I actually only stumbled upon my old blog, after reading a blog post by my high school friend about rock-climbing in Yosemite, who recently watched his friend and climbing partner fall 170 feet, almost to his death, and then they saved each other, and doctors saved them....and at the end they were smiling like they were posing for a picture at Disney World. If I was smiling at the end of that, I would also be in tears....and maybe throwing up....or passing out. Anyway, I wanted to comment and tell him how amazing that is, and then realized that I had an old blog, when it auto-filled in all my comment information. If you're bored at work or something, like I was when I wrote these old posts, you can check 'em out here. Start at the bottom and work your way up, or it might be confusing. (Not really, but it's a more interesting read that way). I guess. I promise it's not as good as Taylor's rock climbing rescue stories, but if you're into subpar tales from work and little volleyball injuries, then it'll be right up your alley.

170 foot free fall and still smiling....sometimes it amazes me what a human can endure. And there's always something to put stuff in perspective for us. For example, (well.... that. When's the last time you fell off a mountain?) But also, the other day I was complaining about money... (my $11 an hour job wasn't cutting it....but really it's not. San Francisco, remember)? And then I got a letter in the mail from a field agent in India, who works with the girl I sponsor through Children International. (Want more info? Ask me! I'm pretty much an expert, I almost got fired from there). Anyway, my beautiful 11 year old Indian girl and her family live on.... $2... A day.

That's hard for me to imagine for A HUNDRED reasons, at least. One, because it's $2...and in America we frame $2 bills because they're "special." And two, because I'm actually swaying in my desk chair from dizziness right now, after my 29 cent meal of ramen noodles last night. Clearly not enough food to feed an actual human, so my poor growing baby in India should definitely not have to worry about that. Her name is Tarjina and I'm not sure that I have fully expressed how beautiful she is yet, so I'll post a picture of her soon, so you guys can also love her from afar, like I do.

I have class tomorrow and I'm not fully prepared for it...although I feel like I am more prepared for this class, than the next class, and the class after that. (And my online screenwriting class, which I could probably do better in if I fell asleep with my head on the keyboard and just turned in UWIEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE).

Times is tough, friends. But like I said....perspective. I may be broke and hungry and one day homeless (not a joke), but at least I have the opportunity to be in school right now, learning about the career that I love the most (regardless of what my grades reflect). And besides... falling out of your desk chair from ramen withdrawals is not nearly as bad as falling off of a mountain.

too busy for a blog?

This is my life.

Does the iphone make a blogger app? So I can blog on the go?

Photos by Andrew Blackman.